What're you? If you want to win the war, tonight; [Landa lightly chops his hands down against the table]. Dialogues from Inglourious Basterds Col. Hans Landa And you need all four to win the war. Col. Hans Landa: Quite well, actually. And that don't sit well with us. He beats German soldiers with a club. And what would that be? You just say "bingo.". : Those who pretend to work as stuntmen inevitably have to use an Italian accent. I'm gonna give you a little somethin' you can't take off. Arriverderci. I can see since you didn't see what happened inside, that the Nazis being there must look odd. After that, while talking to him, one of the soldiers appear to be alive, and one of the Basterds answers him with a shot. We're American! Col. Hans Landa [sits up] [picks up his glass of scotch] Now, I'm the direct descendant of the mountain man Jim Bridger. Col. Hans Landa Lt. Aldo Raine: Sgt. [to Aldo] Lt. Aldo Raine: Hans Landa being the threatening force that he is, he screams his goodbyes to Shoshanna. Bridget von Hammersmark: : [cut back to the Basterds] We got a German here who wants to die for his country! As of this moment, both Omar and Donowitz should be sitting in the very seats we left them in, 0023 and 0024, if my memory serves, explosives still around their ankles, ready to explode, and your mission, some would call it a terrorist plot, as of this moment, is still a go. Actually, Werner, we're all tickled to here you say that. Perrier LaPadite: What the fuck are we supposed to do? He moves closer to Butz as Butz removes his cap to show a large swastika-shaped scar on his forehead]. Col. Hans Landa That's not very Germatic. That's not very Germatic. Winston Churchill: I recorded a new guitarist I met in a cafe last week. Before we get into who shot John, why'd you invite my men to a rendezvous in a basement with a bunch of Nazis? Each and every man under my command owes me one hundred Nazi scalps. Smithson Utivich: Bridget von Hammersmark: General Ed Fenech: [Bridget slowly reaches into Landa's pocket. Col. Hans Landa Why don't you try telling us what the fuck happened? Major Dieter Hellstrom: I mean, if I had my way you'd wear that goddamn uniform for the rest of your pecker-suckin' life. Lt. Aldo Raine : I've heard of the Bear Jew. : Looks like little Max will grow up an orphan. [he hands the General a whiskey] Now, besides you, we know there's another kraut patrol fuckin' around there somewhere. Col. Hans Landa: Bridget von Hammersmark Sgt. Col. Hans Landa: Adolf Hitler: Well, you don't got to be Stonewall Jackson to know you don't want to fight in a basement! : What kind of deal? Tarantino's most powerful skill is his aptitude for dialogue. Donny Donowitz Col. Hans Landa You've had a nice long run, Aldo. I guess so. : The only people who should be allowed in the room are the people who will be moved by the exploits on the screen. As of this moment, both Omar and Donowitz should be sitting in the very seats we left them in, 0023 and 0024, if my memory serves, explosives still around their ankles, ready to explode, and your mission, some would call it a terrorist plot, as of this moment, is still a go. And the second one was called 'Twenty-Four Frame Da Vinci.' A general. : Lt. Archie Hicox: Everybody in the German army's heard of Hugo Stiglitz. You have opera boxes? Donny Donowitz Donny Donowitz Wilhelm: Bridget von Hammersmark: [a smack is heard offscreen] Lt. Aldo Raine Hand me my purse. Adolf Hitler: Like I said, third best. Col. Hans Landa: By all means, Captain. I respectfully refuse, sir. , I'm 'onna give you a little somethin' you can't take off. [Some of the Basterds laugh, and the camera focuses on Stiglitz; the scene freezes and the words "Hugo Stiglitz" appear on the screen]. Perrier LaPadite: Well, you do have to admit, it is catchy. [in German, with subtitles] [in Italian] Lt. Aldo Raine Brad Pitt takes no prisoners in Quentin Tarantino's high-octane WWII revenge fantasy Inglourious Basterds. That's a pretty exciting story. Col. Hans Landa: Smithson Utivich: Lt. Archie Hicox: Wilhelm: Sgt. No, I guess not. Bingo! I can see since you didn't see what happened inside, the Nazis being there must look odd. Lt. Aldo Raine: [to Aldo] : Or it can be lengthy interchanges and speeches that absolutely bleed with poetry and wit and build tremendous . [to Lt. Hicox] What do you mean "the Little Man"? Now, before we yank that slug out you, you need to answer a few questions. Lt. Aldo Raine Col. Hans Landa: Cpl. The feature that makes me such an effective hunter of the Jews is, as opposed to most German soldiers, I can think like a Jew, where they can only think like a German more precisely, German soldier. Like a Katzenjammer Kid. Master SGT. [voice-over] [cut back to the ditch] So you're Aldo the Apache. I'd make that deal. I don't blame ya! Sgt. : Eight Jewish-American soldiers. Col. Hans Landa: Why do we need filmmaking equipment? [in English] Cpl. In fact, why don't you start practicing, right now! [yelling while aiming his gun at the front entrance of the basement-tavern] BRITISH, AMERICAN? Col. Hans Landa ,Pfc. Lt. Aldo Raine [trying to speaking Italian in an attempt to fool Landa to keep up his cover as an Italian actor] Gentlemen, it's a pleasure; the friends of our cherished star, admired by all of us, this outright jewel of our culture, are naturally going to be under my personal protection for the duration of their stay. Free shipping for many products! Where does the hawk look? Col. Hans Landa: : I agree! Long story short, we hear a story too good to be true it ain't. The Germans' nickname for me is the Little Man? Rats were the cause of the bubonic plague, but that's some time ago. Lt. Aldo Raine : [puts his hand over his heart] Maynardville, Tennessee. Thank you, mein Fhrer. No. Without camera movements. Lt. Aldo Raine [to Shosanna] [Maj. Hellstrom cocks his Walther pistol and aims it at Lt. Hicox under the table]. Sgt. Col. Hans Landa In fact, I want all the members of Operation Kino to receive the Congressional Medal of Honor. Bridget von Hammersmark: Sgt. He had just become a-. : Germans would and did notice it. Heard of 'em? : Master SGT. But I got a word of warning for all you would-be warriors. : Well, compared to, say, Louis B. Mayer how's he doing? I can see since you didn't see what happened inside, that the Nazis being there must look odd. [in German] It's just a name that stuck. Fredrick Zoller: Omar speaks third most, so he'll be Donny's assistant. Now, besides you, we know there's another kraut patrol fuckin' around there somewhere. Quite frankly, watchin' Donny beat Nazis to death is the closest we ever get to goin' to the movies. The Englishman gave himself away. Cpl. What are their titles? General Ed Fenech: Wilhelm Wicki: Germans would and did notice it. Lieutenant Archie Hicox reporting, Sir! Multilingualism is a big theme in Inglourious Basterds, as the languages spoken by spies are taken seriously for the first time in the genre's history. That's what I thought. Col. Hans Landa: I just have a few questions, Monsieur LaPadite. You're not trying to fill the house, they're fighting for seats. [after a pause] Sgt. Fenway Park on its feet for Teddy fuckin' Ballgame! It seems I've created a monster. Lt. Aldo Raine: Do you know the latest rumor they've conjured up in their fear-induced delirium? How many seats in your auditorium? [confused] Lt. Aldo Raine Col. Hans Landa It looks like we're supposed to have a Nazi premiere. Col. Hans Landa: [in German as the audience begins to shout in protest and anger] What are we talking about? Donny! Lt. Aldo Raine I propose to you, any disease a rat could spread, a squirrel could equally carry. I read the report on this area. Col. Hans Landa I have an order I want relayed to all German soldiers stationed in France. Lt. Aldo Raine: Bridget von Hammersmark Lt. Aldo Raine : Lt. Archie Hicox: "That's a bingo"? Why the hell is Goebbels doin' stuff so damn peculiar? Now, as far as your paesanos, Sergeant Donowitz and Private Omar Col. Hans Landa: In fact, about a third of the film is non-English and is subtitled. : They're the foot soldiers of a Jew-hatin', mass murderin' maniac and they need to be dee-stroyed. [to Frederick] [puts his hand over his heart] Smithson Utivich [in a very bad accent] Tell me, Aldo, if I were sitting where you're sitting, would you show me mercy? She gasps with pain]. Long story short: We hear a story too good to be true, it ain't. Werner Rachtman: Master SGT. Up 'ere, if you engage in what the federal government calls 'illegal activity,' but what we call 'just a man tryin' to make a livin' for his family sellin' moonshine liquor,' it behooves oneself to keep his wits. And when the German closes their eyes at night and they're tortured by their subconscious for the evil they have done, it will be with thoughts of us they are tortured with. : Lt. Aldo Raine: Nazi ain't got no humanity. : I don't blame ya! : Lt. Aldo Raine: Attaboy, Lieutenant. To get them into the premiere wearing military uniforms with all the military there would've been suicide. Oh, well, must not have been important. : Donny Donowitz: Bridget von Hammersmark: [in Italian, faking confusion] [Nation's Pride is interrupted by Shosanna's movie]. However interesting as the thought may be, it makes not one bit of difference to how you feel. [from offscreen] Where Bridget von Hammersmark? You're letting your imagination get the better of you! I have a message for Germany. Lt. Archie Hicox Bridget von Hammersmark: Pfc. How 'bout you, Utivich? Bridget von Hammersmark: Bridget von Hammersmark Werner Rachtman: Well, back to the whereabouts of your two Italian saboteurs. [Raine is interrogating Rachtman and poitning out all of his men]. You speak German better than your friends? Not only shall I remove it, I intend to burn it. Lt. Archie Hicox: I am going to burn down the cinema on Nazi night. It probably has something to do with the second development. Omar Ulmer Now, as far as your paesanos, Sergeant Donowitz and Private Omar Lt. Aldo Raine Well, now Werner, that's where you're wrong, because that's exactly what I expect. How 'bout you Utivich, can you abide it? Brief him. My name is Lt. Aldo Raine and I'm putting together a special team, and I need me eight soldiers. In the film Landa is heard having mastered at least German, French, English and to a degree Italian. [as-a-matter-of-factly] And that don't sit well with us. Bridget von Hammersmark The Germans' nickname for me is the Little Man? Not one damn bit, sir. Lt. Archie Hicox: Lt. Aldo Raine You don't really know why you don't like them; all you know is you find them repulsive. : And 999 point 999 times out of a million, you would be correct. But going as members of the German film industry, they wear tuxedos and fit in with everybody else. : : Pointed right at your testicles. Perrier LaPadite: : Col. Hans Landa: I was speaking to Captain I-don't-know-what. It would appear he has done everything in his power to earn it. : If you are so desperate for a French girlfriend, I suggest you try Vichy. [in German] He ordered three glasses. If a rat were to scamper through your front door right now, would you greet it with hostility? He had just become a-. Lt. Aldo Raine So you're Aldo the Apache. Lt. Aldo Raine Now, when you report what happened here, you can't tell 'em you told us what you told us. No. You are not to tell anybody anything! Are you going to take off your uniform? The one they call "the Bear Jew" is a golem! You're talking about that. And, as if to make my point, I'm a little surprised how tall you were in real life. Yeah, they made that deal, but they don't give a fuck about him. Lt. Archie Hicox: But if I don't pick up this phone right here, you may very well get all four and if you get all four, you'll end the war tonight. Lt. Aldo Raine Col. Hans Landa: You still get us in that premiere? Shosanna Dreyfus: We just wanted to say we're a big fan of your work. But, Louis B. Mayer wouldn't be Goebbels proper opposite number. Sgt. Bridget von Hammersmark: Shosanna Dreyfus: With less seats it makes the event more exclusive. Lieutenant Aldo, if you don't think I wouldn't interrogate every single one of your swastika-marked survivors We simply aren't operating on the level of mutual respect I assumed. Col. Hans Landa The whole movie is dubbed, so the original dialogue would have had little sense. [Stiglitz is seen strangling one officer with a cord; stabbing another multiple times in the head through a pillow; and asphyxiating one with his bare hands]. Pfc. Who wants to send a message to Germany? Lt. Aldo Raine: But I do have one question. ,Pfc. : I don't think so. Lt. Aldo Raine And, as if to make my point, I'm a little surprised how tall you were in real life. The lie is a series of false and hidden . Col. Hans Landa: : Pfc. Smithson Utivich: [Marcel is beating up a sound technician]. : : Now, say we let you go, and say you survive the war. It works superb. Werner Rachtman: But in the pages of history, every once in a while, Fate reaches out and extend its hand. Bridget von Hammersmark I've had a gun pointed at your balls since you sat down. Aldo the Apache and the Little Man? [mispronouncing the name] [to Aldo] Arriverderci. Pvt. Narrator: So, I visited America, aye? Bridget von Hammersmark Thank you. : So you're "Aldo the Apache". From killing off Hitler to scalping Nazis, there's everything in this film. They'll shoot ya. I have no doubt. And I'm beginning to think my participation in this event could be meaningful. I'm sorry, again? Hirschberg Wilhelm Wicki As a German enlisted man, he killed thirteen Gestapo officers. [giddy] Why not? And I would like the United States of America to purchase property for me on Nantucket Island as a reward for all the countless lives I've saved by bringing the tyranny of the National Socialist party to a swifter-than-imagined end. Everybody needs to calm down! So. Enormous changes at the last minute? You'll be shot for this! As the weeks have gone on and the Americans are on the beach, I do find myself thinking more and more about this Private Zoller. They bite people. I've heard the Fhrer has put you in charge of rounding up the Jews left in France who are either hiding or passing for gentile. He moves closer to Butz as Butz removes his cap to show a large swastika-shaped scar on his forehead, Hellstrom is trying to guess the famous person on his forehead, which is King Kong, He pours wine for himself, Aldo, and Utivich, to Butz, after beating Rachtman to death with his Louisville Slugger, seeing Shosanna dressed up for the premiere, He digs his fingers into her bullet wound. Lt. Aldo Raine: Well, I speak the most Italian, so I'll be your escort. I've been chewed out before. A damn good dectective. : [Raine is interrogating Rachtman and poitning out all of his men]. Col. Hans Landa Tuxedos. : Thelongestfilm.com - Review Inglourious Basterds. Donowitz speaks the second most, so he'll be your Italian cameraman. Well, ain't that a real nice boy? Butz Well, I speak the most Italian, so I'll be your escort. Make a deal. You met the sergeant yourself! So, the way I see it, since Hitler's death or possible rescue rests solely on my reaction, if I do nothing, it's as if I'm causing his death even more than yourselves. And except for the tail, they even rather look alike, don't they? And the German won't not be able to help themselves but to imagine the cruelty their brothers endured at our hands, and our boot heels, and the edge of our knives. Col. Hans Landa: Joseph Goebbels: Major Dieter Hellstrom: : You remember him, don't you? [Landa aggressively grabs Bridget by the throat, throws her off the chair and violently strangles her to death]. : Well, you don't got to be Stonewall Jackson to know you don't want to fight in a basement! I mean, you're a little fellow, but not "circus-midget" little, as your reputation would suggest. : Listening to music or the radio can be great ways to passively practice a language. It can either be a simple conversation that seems to have nothing to do with the scene, yet is full of subtext (Pulp Fiction is full of such scenes). And I want you to look deep into the face of the Jew that is going to do it! [in German; subtitled] : : YES, SIR! Ooh! Mir scheint, da fehlt jemand. Eliza on Ice? This is your finest film yet. In Quentin Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds, Hans Landa speaks English, German, French, and Italian fluently. Alas, you're now in the hands of the SS. : Did you hear that? So, the way I see it, since Hitler's death or possible rescue rests solely on my reaction, if I do nothing, it's as if I'm causing his death even more than yourselves. Werner Rachtman Col. Hans Landa: Lt. Aldo Raine: So, gentlemen, let's discuss the prospect of ending the war tonight. Lt. Aldo Raine General Ed Fenech: I arranged for the tailor to fit three tuxedos tonight. You speak English pretty good for a German. He looks in the barn, he looks in the attic, he looks in the cellar, he looks everywhere he would hide. It couldn't be both. Col. Hans Landa: Col. Hans Landa : 'Flickers Bi-Monthly', and I've had two books published. Lieutenant Hicox was going as my escort. "Well, I speak the most Italian, so I'll be your escort. Col. Hans Landa Col. Hans Landa: Now, y'all might've heard rumors about the armada happening soon. Col. Hans Landa Donny Donowitz: Joseph Goebbels: Lt. Aldo Raine Lt. Aldo Raine Col. Hans Landa: I'm betting for OSS would be my guess. You speak German better than your friends?
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